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3 Tips for Taking Yourself on a Date

Updated: Nov 4, 2022

Why should I take myself on a date? Won't people look at me weird?

Taking yourself on a date practically means taking the time to water the plants of your soul and recognize your personal needs. Create space to ask for what you need, and allowing those needs to be poured into. Living full life will have a profoundly positive impact on every aspect of your life, your career, and the your community. Our hearts have been described as the “wellspring of life” and practically speaking, we want access to that wellspring and want it to overflow into the rest of your life!

While watching a YouTuber during the pandemic they mentioned the idea of taking yourself on a date literally (I had always imagined it more figuratively). I felt both kind of funny about the concept and curious. Why does it matter? Wouldn’t I feel uncomfortable taking myself on a date?

With a bit of research, the benefits of taking myself on a date were apparent. I then had to talk myself out of the un-comfortability of going out solo. So I blocked out an afternoon/evening, chose a few simple things I love to do, and dove in.

Taking yourself on a date can be as simple as spending time doing something you love.

So here’s what my self-date looked like; I knew that I love coffee and matcha, I love the beach, and I love ocean views (I'm a simple man after all). After a long day of meetings in another city, I grabbed a hot Matcha from a nearby favorite coffee shop in Newport Beach, CA and hopped in my car. Although it was a chilly “winter” California afternoon, I drove a few minutes to the beach, laid out a blanket, sat down, and with my hot matcha in hand, I enjoyed a gorgeous sunset.

Taking myself on a date was surprisingly easy and rewarding to my soul. I felt a relaxed happiness surfacing, a sense of fulfillment after hard day’s work, and gratitude for life itself. I took a moment to journal my thoughts and take in the experience in a way that would stay with me.

So How Do You Start?

I'm glad you asked! Here are 3 tips to keep in mind when taking yourself on a date:

  1. Choose activities or places to be you already know you love

  2. Leave expectations behind and be fully present

  3. Turn off your phone. Let anyone important know where you’ll be and that you’ll be available after a set time (It'll be tempting to use your phone if you get nervous around others)

Keep you self-date simple. This is a moment where everything else is on hold and your heart is being invested into. A fulfilled you will only add to a (current or future) romantic relationship.

If you’re single, a fulfilled you will also benefit everyone around you. This is a practice I’ll continue to take with me and I hope you will find benefit in too. Let’s continue to tap into that “wellspring of life” and bring that life to those around us!

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